July New Book Releases Summer books

Happy July friends! I hope you're all surviving this summer heat! If you're in 100 degree heat like me then I hope that you've gotten to escape to the beach to keep from melting! I've had some time to do some reading recently and I have some REALLY good ones to share with you. I honestly have been dying to share these!

Girls Night Out - Liz Fenton

Out July 24

Girls Night Out: What my nightmares are made of. Seriously, this book will keep you from ever drinking too much or touching anything that might possible lead to a blackout. What's scarier than waking up on the beach in Mexico with no memory of what happened the night before? Waking up on the beach in Mexico with no memory and NOT BEING ABLE TO LOCATE YOUR BEST FRIEND.

This book by Liz Fenton had me on the edge of my seat the entire way through. I do have a couple of complaints, however. I feel like this book could have been about 100 pages shorter. I feel like there were a lot of repetitive moments and there were a few situations that dragged on without much purpose that could have definitely been cut down. And secondly, holy teenage drama. There are A LOT of immature arguments that were difficult to get through. There's something very irritating about reading page after page of 40 year old women acting like a bunch of 14 year olds. BUT if you can get through those couple of flaws then you are sure to enjoy this whodunnit mystery. It's sure to be one of the best of the summer!

Bring Me Back - B. A Paris

This is the third novel that I've read by B.A Paris and it's sure to not be the last! What I love about Paris is her ability to draw out suspense throughout an entire book without making it frustrating or boring. She did that in Behind Closed Doors, she did that in The Breakdown and she's done it again in Bring Me Back. The story is about a missing woman and the young man who was madly in love with her and jumps between then and the present. It's 12 years later and he has moved on and is now engaged to her sister. Life is going well until events arise that make him believe that his missing girlfriend may be alive and may have returned.

For a while I actually had no idea where this book was headed, which is a good thing. It's refreshing to read a book that isn't predictable, but it also means that I basically can't put the book down and you won't be able to reach me until I finish.

But holy paranoia! Bring Me Back left me not know what to believe at the end of every chapter. I was certain I had figured it out about 12 separate times and I was wrong every time.

Bravo to Paris for such a unique read

She Was the Quiet One -Michelle Campbell 

Out July 31

I was so drawn into this story that I read it in two sittings! Have you ever read a book full of so much drama that you're happy that your life is completely boring and the biggest enemy you have is the girl at Lowes who gives you dirty looks? That's how this book made me feel. But holy amazeballs, it makes for great entertainment.
She Was the Quiet one is centered around a tangled web of secrets and deceit between two recently orphaned teenage twins and a gaggle of students and faculty at their prestigious boarding school. Complete opposites in every sense, Bel and  Rose arrive at their new school unaware of how much their world is about to change. Between navigating through the loss of their mother and finding their place in their new school, a rivalry arises that takes their situation from bad to worse and somehow ends in murder. But of who? And by whom?
This is far from your usual whodunnit mystery. For the majority of the novel the victim isn't revealed so you're left trying to answer not one, but two questions throughout it's entirety. Oh man is that fun! I went through dozens of different scenarios and possibilities before it became clear what had transpired.

Check Out last months reading list HERE

And dont forget to follow me on Goodreads!

4th of July Style Ideas!

Where has June gone? It seriously feels like it was barely June 1st and now here I am picking out 4th of July outfits. How does that happen? Have you made your plans for the 4th yet? Mine aren't solid, so I have several different options, but whether its the beach, a backyard, or somewhere a little bit fancy, I've found some great options!

Which is your favorite?

June New Releases Book List

Happy June ladies! Ready for another reading list? I've been going back and forth through reading binges and that's completely ok with me. If you read my post at the beginning of the year about goals I had for myself then you already know that I wanted to not feel forced to read this year. I read over 50 books last year and it was wonderful, but I will admit that there were times that I read purely because I felt like I had to. Reading is something I enjoy so I want to make sure that I don't lose that enjoyment because of obligation. Anyway, I recently binged on a bunch of books that are finally being released this month (and some being released in July so stay tuned!) Here are my June release book picks!

Jar Of Hearts

Out June 11

A riveting story jumping back 14 years and back to the present to tell the story of how Georgina ended up in prison and what really happened the night that changed everything. Georgina was 16 years old and life was wonderful until her best friend, Angela, went missing without a trace. She mourned, along with all their other friends and family, but Angela was never found. Georgina’s life went on and suddenly she was 30 years old, had a wonderful career, and was engaged to the wealthy owner of the company she worked for. Until the past came knocking on her door. Georgina finds herself being the top story plastered all over the news; Successful business woman, engaged to wealthy business owner, arrested for murder of her childhood best friend alongside serial killer boyfriend.

A different angle on your usual whodunnit, this story has such interesting and non-predictable twists that make this one of the must reads of the summer! 

California Summer

Out June 19th

THE summer beach read for 2018. This book by Anita Hughes left me hoping for a sequel. She did a wonderful job creating characters that were likable and incredibly relatable, right down to the childish  reactions in stressful situations. We've all been there! The story is about young Rosie who has it all. A great career, a smart and savvy boyfriend, and a dream life in Beverly Hills. When the walls start caving in around her she escapes to Santa Barbara. Living on the edge of uncertainty in her best friends childhood guest house, Rosie has no choice but to make a decision: Get her life back or start a new one.

This story about passion and dreams was exactly what I needed to get me out of the funk that I was in. Rosie reawakened my spirit through her emotional rollercoaster and courage. Plus this book oozes girl power moments. Between the dreamy Santa Barbara beach descriptions and the man candy, you won't know what to drool over more.

When You Knew

 Out June 26

The third installment of my favorite literary family, the Cabot series takes us through Gentry's struggle as a single mom. I've already gushed about the first two books and how much I enjoy the characters surrounding the Cabot family and this third book is no exception!

Harrys Trees

Out June 12

Enjoyable story about letting go after tragedy and moving on.

Check out my Spring Book Picks
And don't forget to follow me on Goodreads!

Update! May Book Reading Club

Since I've been reading a lot less this year I decided to change how I do my monthly reading lists. Some months I may still share several books that I've loved, but I also want to do some more interactive lists where I can share my thoughts as I read a new release that I am excited about and that I think you lovely ladies are excited about, too.

So follow along for updates and my thoughts as I read How To Walk Away by Katherine Center!

Update #1

Wow. Wow. WOW. This book starts off intense. I had to pause a few times in just the first 50 pages to collect myself because it was really emotionally difficult to read. I think the reason for that is because it's one of those "It could happen to anybody" types of situations. One minute Margaret is on the cusp of everything she ever dreamed of. She graduated college, is about to start a wonderful job, and just became engaged to the love of her life. Things couldn't be more perfect for her, until everything changes in one single moment. It's difficult to swallow how one single event has the power to change everything. It happens everyday. It could happen to me or you. The thought of that is terrifying. So while I can already tell that How to Walk Away is going to be an emotional rollercoaster, I cannot wait to see where the story goes. Bravo to Katherine Center for creating dialog and content that has the ability to draw out so much emotion from a reader so early on!

Update #2

Holy appreciation. This book has me appreciating every little thing. There have been a couple lines that stood out and really resonated with me. One in particular, that I won't include as to not give away any spoilers, is a situation that you and I take for granted and don't give a second thought to, but here is brave little Margaret hoping and praying for this simple little thing to "impress us all". It is incredibly humbling and breaks my heart all at once. 

Update #3

I had to pace myself and not finish this book in one sitting like I was so tempted to do. This touched my heart so deeply. Katherine Center did a wonderful job creating a moving story that inspires and humbles. I think my favorite line that brought me to ugly tears came after Katherine was having a really difficult day and she really just let all her pain show "It's the trying that heals you. That's all you have to do. Just try" I think that's true of anything. You can be going through the most difficult situation of your life and usually there is nothing in particular that will fix it. It's truly the trying that heals you.

This book is about CHOOSING happiness. It's about how even when you are handed the most difficult cards in life, you can choose to make the most of it. Margaret is a likable character that I think we all strive to be like. When she is hit by tragedy, she tries to get back up. When her heart is broken, she tries to be happy anyway. When she is faced with family issues, she pushes through. When the person who is supposed to be helping her isn't exactly helping in the way she thinks she needs, she tries anyway. And we get to go along the ride for those moments when she does give up. We get to feel the struggle with her. And then in true Margaret fashion, she dusts herself off again and we get to experience that as well. 

I recommend this book to absolutely everybody. There are so many wonderful things to be taken away from this story. It changes you. It makes you want to try harder. It makes you want to appreciate the little things. I think the greatest gift this book will give though, is understanding. A deeper understanding for those struggling. And we really need more of that in the world 

Officially on sale today!

https://bitly.com/howtowalkaway

Get Your Natural Looking Summer Glow!

Happy Monday Lovelies! I hope all you mommies had a wonderful Mother's Day as well as any of you who strive to be mommies, those who have miscarried, those who have lost mothers and those who are pet mommies (not the same thing, but in your pets eyes it is, right?) I hope you were celebrated and I hope you feel appreciated.

Today I'm sharing with you the products I've been using to give me a nice glow that makes it look like I've been spending some time at the beach soaking up the rays, when in reality I've been sitting at my desk eating cookies.

Up first: Skin! I recently started using two Lancome products that I'm now completely in love with. They are one of those rare products that start to improve your skin with just a few uses. Used together, the Genifique serum and the Renergie Dark Spot Correcting Moisturizer have given me a healthy glow. I have always struggled with dull and tired skin, so waking up to vibrant, healthy looking skin makes me so excited. They are pricey products, but well worth it if you too are looking for a healthy glow.

Another skin product that has been helping me with both a natural and a faux glow is the PoreDermabrasion Pore Perfecting Exfoliator. I use this a few times a week to polish off dead skin cells and leave behind new, healthy skin. The tiny little sand like granules really get deep in your pores and leave your skin extra clean and smooth. I'm obsessed with how this has helped the texture of my skin. This is also great to use before using a fake tanner!

There are two tanners that I'm currently loving. I've talked about my love of the St. Tropez tanner and I still love it. Pair it with the mitt and you have yourself a fool proof, natural looking tan in just a few hours! Another option that I started using this year and have really enjoyed is the Josie Maran Liquid Gold Tanning Oil. This is another fool proof option that you can use a mitt with and end up with a healthy looking glow. It's also available in two scents, so you can choose which one you like best. I have been using the Josie Maran Face Tanning Oil for a few years, but sadly I think it has been discontinued. I still have a tiny bit left so that's what I have been using on my face, but I need some recommendations before it completely runs out! If you have any facial tanning products that you enjoy please share them with me!

Thank heavens for tanners! My highlighter legs were beyond offensive

Next up: Makeup! There are a couple products that I have been using pretty much daily to help me achieve this bronzed look.

One is a new discovery that I was hesitant about. I've shared my love of the It Cosmetics CC Cream and Bye Bye Under Eye Concealer in the past, but the idea of combining those two just didn't seem up my alley. I prefer a light feeling foundation with medium coverage so the Bye Bye Foundation just sounded too heavy for me. I was so wrong! From the moment I put this foundation on my skin was glowing! It applied beautifully and felt so lightweight on my skin while still having good coverage. The best part is that it wears throughout the day like a dream! After a full day my skin still looks great by the time I'm ready to remove my makeup. I love the natural look of this foundation!

A liquid highlighter that I was using years ago and recently rediscovered and have been loving is the Becca Shimmering Skin Perfector in Opal. I love the natural looking glow this gives my skin. I apply it to the tops of my cheekbones, bridge of my nose, cupids bow, along my collar bone, and on the tip of my shoulder blade. It gives your skin a radiance that looks like you're just glowing from within. I also have the powder form of this highlighter, but I personally feel like liquid highlighters look more natural. I'm not trying to look like a disco ball (usually! some days you gotta rock that disco ball look!) so I just want something that makes my skin look it's best and this highlighter does that!

My favorite bronzer for a natural sun kissed look is the Benefit Hoola Bronzer. There is also a light version if you feel like the original shade is too intense for you. I feel like this is the most natural looking bronzer on the market that still gives your skin a flawless and non shimmery finish. Just a little bit will go a long way on lighter skin and will make you look like you came straight from the beach!

I've also linked below this fabulous lilac top I'm wearing int he photos that is under $10! But hurry because sizes are going fast!

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Workout Outfit Inspiration & Spring Book Reccomendations

Happy Friday! We made it! I'm about to head to my nephew's birthday sleepover party with his little friends. And by little I mean 13. I'm that embarrassing aunt that invited herself and proud of it! But hey, at least I'm sleeping upstairs with my other nephew and giving them their space, right? And I'm making breakfast so that gives me a little leeway, right? Right? I'm trying to justify my actions here.

Do you have any exciting weekend plans? Do share!

I wanted to quickly share this workout outfit I shared on my Instagram yesterday because I still LOVE these shoes and this tank is a new favorite. Also, I feel like I need to mention that these leggings are a $15 Walmart find and I am quite impressed with the quality. Of course they are nothing like my all or Lululemon leggings, BUT I do think that they are great affordable options that will last me for a while. Plus they have a nifty little pocket on the leg!

I also wanted to quickly round up my favorite books from the past year or so that you might now have read yet, but would be perfect for you to read this spring or summer. These are all great thrillers that will keep you on the edge of your seat and are guaranteed to enjoy!

Click each link to read more of what I thought and check the book out for yourself!

I Am Watching You | Behind Closed Doors | It's Always the Husband | Lie To Me | The Breakdown

A Casual Weekend Look and Fostering Kittens

Happy Wednesday Ladies! Is it just me or is this week moving super slowly? It's been that kind of a week where nothing seems to run smoothly and things that should be simple in quick turn into complicated messes. But hang tight because we're halfway to the weekend and I have some cute casual pieces to share with you.

We all know I love a good casual outfit and lately I've been loving Free People's comfy options! I especially love the cute little lace detail of these bralettes peeking out from the sides of the tank.  I've ordered both this tank and lace bralette in several colors and expect to picking up a few more because they're just so perfect for spring and summer. AND they're at a fantastic price point at $20 so they're guilt free purchases!

I've worn this bag to death and it is completely sold out in most colors, but I'm having a hard time finding another similar style that I love just as much. I tend to use the same bag regularly because I hate switching them out, but also because I love to use my pieces. I hate having too much stuff so I only buy things that I know I will get a lot of use out of. So if you have a favorite everyday bag let me know so I can check it out because I'm having a hard time picking one out right now!

I also want to talk about these super comfortable scallop wedges. They have the most beautiful feminine detail along the edges and are easy to maintain. I've had issues with other suede wedges scuffing, but these just wipe clean and look good as new. I've worn them all day at times and never find them to be uncomfortable or need breaking in. AND they're $60!

I also realized that I haven't mentioned on here that I am fostering a family of kittens. Momma cat was a stray who I began feeding when I noticed she was pregnant, so she stuck around and on March 16th she gave birth to a litter of 6 cute little kittens. They are now running around and only a few weeks away from being able to go to their new families, but in the mean time they are keeping me pretty busy with constant cleaning and fun cuddling sessions. Most of them have already found homes, but my two sweet little girls are still looking for their future family so I'm keeping my fingers crossed for them. I'll be sharing more about my adventure with them and some pictures very soon so stay tuned!

My Picks from Target's Opalhouse Release

I had been waiting for Target to release their Opalhouse for SO long. I haven't been very impressed with a lot of the recent hyped up collections from Hearth and Home and was really itching for some unique pieces so when I first saw a sneak peek of Opalhouse a couple of months ago I nearly lost my shizz. Ok I totally lost my shizz. How freaking amazing is this collection? It is so quirky and feels very much like pieces you would expect from Anthropologie for much much more.

It has been really difficult to not empty out my bank account and just buy everything. Everyday I go back to the site and convince myself I "need" another pie!ce for my home because how tragic would it be to suddenly see the words SOLD OUT, right?

So I put together a list of my favorites. Some I already ordered or picked up, some I have every intention of eventually picking up, and a few I just love so much and am contemplating completely redecorating so that they will go with me decor.

Enjoy!

What the Heck Daisy?

Hi friends!

I know. I know.

What the heck happened?

The last you heard from me I was telling you about how I was back and I really felt like I was making some progress healing. I was on the right track and I was doing so well when BAM, something changed all that. I won't get into what that "something" was, but it was definitely two steps forward and one step back in the whole healing process. My anxiety is all over the place and I could pretty much cry at any given moment. It's crazy what a roller coaster of emotions loss takes you through.

It really got me to thinking how so many of us have experienced loss. So many of us have experienced something that rocked us to the core, but NOBODY is talking about it. We all just sweep it under our safe and private rug and pretend that we've got it all together. Why do we do that? There is so much power in sharing our struggles and being able to lean on each other so why don't we take advantage of it? I've grown so tired of logging onto Instagram or Youtube and seeing all these "perfect" lives only to be followed up a few months later with news of a divorce or loss and an explanation of how what they showed on the surface wasn't reality. As an extremely private person, I get it. I get not wanting to let everybody know that something is going on, but in the end aren't we hurting ourselves? We are depriving ourselves of some potentially helpful shoulders to lean on.

I don't want to do that anymore. I don't want to be absent from social media or my blog anymore just because what I'm dealing with is difficult and I'd rather deal with it quietly on my own. Maybe admitting that I'm struggling can help others unburden themselves a little bit. Loss is not an easy thing. Especially when it is further complicated like in my situation.

That doesn't mean we have to go into detail and share our darkest secrets, it just means that we allow ourselves to not be ok. It means that we allow ourselves to feel those emotions and share them with somebody (or your entire following. Go you!) who could end up needing to share their own struggles themselves.

I'm not saying I want to dwell on it. Not by any means. I have my good days when I'm able to be a little more care free, but I don't want to hinder my healing process anymore by hiding when I'm not feeling that way. I don't see anything wrong with that. I actually see so much good coming out of sharing those things that are so difficult to admit.

Life is not perfect. Why do we have such a desire to make it seem like it is? There is such beauty in being able to recover from painful events. There's so much to be learned from being strong enough to face our problems. We could help each other so much just by admitting "I'm struggling".

There have been a few things that have been helping me through my struggles, though. One of which is a complete surprise out of left field (yay for trying something new!)

• Loosening the strings on my strict dairy free and gluten free diet. It's weird how allowing myself a little more control on this helps me feel less stressed. This doesn't mean I go all out and eat a bunch of crap. It's kind of the opposite. Not restricting myself makes me feel like I have more of a choice and just makes me feel like I have control over something, even if it's just this one little thing. And I'll tell you it actually makes a huge difference. I still stay away from anything dairy 99% of the time, but I allow myself a day or two of bread full of that infamous gluten. Gluten free bread is just awful. I can't do it. So letting myself indulge every once in a while does a lot of good for my emotional well being.

• Painting. Letting emotions loose in something creative is so therapeudic. I had an incredible painting session a few weeks ago that may have involved Andra Day's "Rise Up", ugly crying, and a ruined painting.

• Inspiring Instagrammers. AllieDarr- Here is a woman who believes in everything I just talked about. She shares her real life and struggles everyday through her stories and posts. Girlfriend keeps it REAL. She shows real moments with her five (yes FIVE) kids, struggles with insecurities and issues with food. There is so much comfort in her sharing issues that I can relate to but nobody wants to talk about (like issues with gut health) I strive to be as candid as her. Alyson Hayley- Her work ethic is the best and it gets me going on days when I need it. Plus she has two of the cutest dogs ever which she features on her stories all the time. Instant mood lifter!

• Podcasts. If you would have told me a few weeks ago that I would be listening to podcasts nonstop, I would have told you that you were crazy. I always thought they weren't for me. I'm a huge lover of music, it really speaks to my soul and I couldn't imagine giving up any music listening time. In my eyes it was kind of like listening to an Ebook: NOT FOR ME. I'd much rather just read the book. I'd heard about so many different podcasts, but none of them appealed to me enough to choose to listen to one over music. And then LaurenKaySims (she's one of my favorites too!) mentioned in an Instagram story how productive a Skinny Confidential podcast made her feel and something just clicked. I work in a creative field and have REALLY been struggling with motivation so this immediately peaked my interest. I immediately pulled up The Skinny Confidential and binged on a bunch of episodes. If you haven't listened to them and are the entrepreneurial type, but need a little motivation then I HIGHLY reccomend you look them up. I always feel so inspired after an episode. Just hearing about how other people function and operate is so motivational. I've noticed a huge difference in my work since I started listening.

• Music. Like I said above, music is extremely important to me. I think it's a great healing tool for anybody going through a hard time. Even instrumentals have so much power and emotion that can do wonders. There are songs for every emotion and experience. Belting out a song that talks about how you're feeling is basically free therapy in my opinion. 

Right now I feel like I'm all about surrounding myself with people who inspire me to be my best self (even if that means just through IG!) I feel like I really have a need for that positive energy, but I also need it to be real so I am trying to stay away from too much of that perfectionism that floods the internet world.

I thank you all for being so supportive and lovely and I hope you stick around!

February Reading List

Happy Friday Ladies! I decided to keep doing my monthly book reading lists, but I don't have a set number on how many I will share every month. It could range from just one to four, but they are guaranteed to only be books that I feel are worth sharing. If a book doesn't get me interested enough to keep reading it by a certain point then I'm not going to force myself to finish it anymore. If you read my post from yesterday then you know that I am staying away from setting a specific number on how many books I am trying to read this year. I will only read and share what I feel really merits my time and attention.

So let's jump straight into my picks for this month!

The English Wife

A soap opera of the Gilded Age, The English Wife tells the story of Annabelle and Bayard Vanyvil in New York. After a quick romance in London Bay comes home to New York with a mysterious new bride to present to his family and New York high society. Things begin to unravel and end in a murder with so many twists and turns that it's hard to tell where the truth ends and lies begin. Lauren Willig wrote a wonderful story that keeps you turning page after page and scratching your head after every new revelation. She also does a wonderful job creating a visual of the beauty and opulence that the wealthy enjoyed during this time period. It's a wonderful story full of romance, mystery and plenty of unsolicited gossip!

The Wife Between Us

Holy twists and turn Batman! The Wife Between Us is a wild rollercoaster of emotions. Think you feel anger? Pity? Compassion? Think again. You’ll be left not knowing how to feel. Who are the victims? Is anyone innocent? Truth and lies become so blended in this novel by Greer Hendricks and Sarah Pekkanen and you are left on the edge of your seat. So many questions and the need to know the answers resulted in flying through this book in one day.

When Vanessa finds out that the woman her husband left her for is now engaged to him her world comes crashing down. Her one concern becomes stopping the wedding. She cannot marry him. She will not let that happen. She’s in a downward spiral after he left her with nothing. Seeming to have the same mental issues as her mother and drinking too much to boot, things are not looking good for this poor desperate woman. But something just doesn’t seem right. There’s a tiny voice in the back of yourmind starting to connect the dots and just when you think you have it figured out there’s another twist.

An absolute page turner and a wonderful mystery, I highly recommend this one, but be prepared to cancel all the plans you had that day because you will not be able to put it down!

The Family Next Door

A look at what really goes on inside the homes of one suburban neighborhood. This book tells the story of a seemingly quiet street that is everything but peaceful. Full of drama, betrayal, and just a hint of mystery, The Family Next Door leaves you with a feeling of "something isn't quite right" when a new woman moves in. The story that unfolds is highly entertaining and completely unexpected.

  

Heart Talk and 2017 Year in Review

Happy 2018! I know I'm a whole month late, but I'll get more into that in a minute. I hope your year has gotten off to a good start and that you are sticking to those New Years Resolutions. I'd love to know what you have committed to this year! Last year I set out to read at least 52 books and I had surpassed that goal by October and while I'm quite proud of that, this year is going to be a little different.

2017 was an extremely difficult year for me. I had no idea just how much everything would affect me emotionally and to say that I wasn't prepared is an understatement. My dad was in and out of the hospital all year and then he was released to us in in-home hospice care in August, so really for a majority of 2017 my life was completely upside down and we all know that life stops for no one. I still had to keep up with all the regular everyday things. Work, my relationship, friends. It was a balancing act that I was trying to hard to manage, but there's only so much you can do before you just feel completely burnt out and that's exactly what happened to me. 

This January for me was the month of just doing the absolute bare minimum. I took time away from social media. I rested. I got the flu and rested some more. I watched tv. I didn't read at all. I ate crap. None of it was planned ahead of time, but when December 31 rolled around and I had invitations to do some really exciting things and all I wanted to do was lay on the couch and not talk to anyone, I knew I needed to just take time for myself and my mental well being. I went straight from my dads funeral to hosting two weeks of rosaries, the funeral, and the burial to caring for my mom. Then came thanksgiving and my brother-in-laws big 40th birthday and we went straight into Christmas planning mode. At no point did I really get to just BE. To just feel what I was feeling and to just rest. So taking January to do that was absolutely essential for me to get back on track.

I'm now back to eating healthy and working out daily which feels amazing. I feel like I can finally think straight and just breathe without the weight of the world on my shoulders. I feel inspired and have the itch to create again. Overall, I just feel like me again. 

And it feels amazing.

I wish there was more to prepare you for loss. I wish there was some sort of handbook that you could share that makes everything easier. I feel like I have so much I could talk about on the topic, but none of that really helps. People can tell you to do this or that, to remember to take care of yourself, to reach out when you need to talk, but when you are faced with this difficult situation everything you know goes out the window. I felt like my brain stopped functioning entirely. I knew the things that people were telling me, but nothing really registered. I was just going through the motions and I feel like that's completely normal. Sometimes you do just need to feel. Sometimes there's absolutely no way to make anything better other than to just go through it and then eventually you come up on that day where you just wake up, brush yourself off and things suddenly feel a little bit easier. 

There is so much pressure coming from a million different directions on HOW you should be dealing. And this applies to so much more than just loss. We have pressure from work, pressures from ourselves, pressures on social media and all of this can be suffocating sometimes. We all need to remember to take a step back every once in a while and evaluate what our needs are and what is going to lead to our happiness.

And that kind of ties in to my resolutions for 2018. I have a bunch of little goals that tie into the main idea of focusing on what truly makes my heart happy and what really is good for my emotional well being. So while reading 52 books last year was a wonderful goal and I enjoyed myself it did add the pressure of reaching a certain number. 

This year I want to feed my creativity with the beauty of nature and the little things. Being out among the trees or sitting on the edge of the water does so much good for my soul. I want to push my body to do as much as it can. I find so much peace when I am working on getting stronger. I want to fuel my body with foods that are good for my body, but not deprive it of things that I love. None of these goals have a specific number or rules and that is the exact point. I want to learn to give my mind and body what they need without putting pressures on myself of numbers or restrictions.

And when it comes to social media, I want to share what I truly love. I feel like I have struggled with this when it comes to Instagram for years and that's why I have to take such long breaks from the platform. I'm tired of surrounding myself with post after post of "buy this, buy that" and just the overall concept of THINGS bringing happiness. They don't. I love so much more than clothes and makeup. I put myself into this little corner that leaves me feeling superficial and like I'm not completely being true to myself. I love creating, I love fitness, I love nature, I love trying new healthy recipes, and I love to just have meaningful conversations. I want to share more of that. I want to inspire.

So I'll leave you with a couple of little tid-bits about myself so you can get to know the real me!

•  I am the anti-hoarder and constantly donate things that I don't use enough. I can't stand having too much stuff.
• I have digestive issues and stick to a gluten, dairy and soy free diet. A lot of what I eat is vegan. I enjoy fish too much otherwise I'd happily be completely vegan.
• I know a ridiculous amount of lyrics. I just love music. It speaks deep to my heart in ways nothing else does... and other music just fulfills my need of shaking my bootay!
• I am a crazy animal lover. Kitty was actually a stray that I befriended because I always kept a stash of cat food for strays. My mom also took in a stray because I was feeding her while my dad was sick. 
• I'm a complete nerd and proud. I love to learn. I love history. I can go down the Wiki rabbit hole like no other. I can start by reading about Ann Boleyn and then three hours later I'm an expert on the culinary preferences of her second cousin.